How do I delicately tell my wife that she is fat?

Dear Liz,
My wife has an important event coming up and she’s planning to wear a dress that she always wears to special functions. While I do love her, she has put on a few pounds and I can’t bring myself to tell her that the dress doesn’t look good anymore. What should I do?
– Only Trying To Help

Um. Sir? Are you gunning to end up as one of my most popular divorce questions? Just wondering because the only right answer to this question is YOU DON’T.

Fun facts:

  1. People who have gained weight know they have gained weight and do not need it pointed out to them.
  2. Clothing shrinks over time. And even if it doesn’t shrink, you stick with “clothing shrinks over time.”
  3. Being fat is not a reason to feel shame. Robbing a bank, slapping a stranger, peeing in the pool, on the other hand, are all great reasons to feel shame.

Unless your wife is entirely out of touch with her body image then she likely knows that her favorite dress doesn’t fit the way it once did. But, hey, if that dress still makes her feel sexy and spiffy then who cares what she looks like? Let her put the dress on and feel great for an evening even if it means you having to keep your lips zipped about it. She can decide for herself if and when it is time to retire her favorite dress.

Good luck!

~ Liz